We might think of the ego as the psychological analog of the physical body. We naturally distinguish our body from the rest of physical reality. We are concerned with its survival and work to defend it against perceived threats. Similarly, we distinguish our ego—our sense of personal identity and self-understanding—from those of others. And just as we defend our bodies, we feel compelled to protect and defend our ego. But why? We defend our bodies for obvious reasons, but why is it necessary to protect an immaterial, abstract ego?
The reason seems largely a social one. Since we evolved and dwell in a social context, our ability to physically survive (and thrive) is in many ways contingent on our ability to do so socially. Therefore, the ego can be viewed as a tool that evolved to improve the odds of individual survival in a social world. The ability to protect and defend the ego has come to seem equally important as physical self-preservation.
The need to define, identify with, and defend the ego has found its peak in modern life. Even a century ago, there was a diminished emphasis on individual psychology. People functioned largely according to gender roles and fashioned their identity around existing religious and cultural traditions. Nowadays, however, we are encouraged to “know ourselves” and “stay true to ourselves.” We no longer accept a pregiven identity or worldview, but are admonished to personally assemble our own.
While increasing individuality has been a blessing in some respects, it has been a curse in others. Namely, it has placed tremendous pressure on the individual. In modern life, we not only strive to be socially successful, but also try to stay true to ourselves in the process. Our success is not only evaluated externally (i.e., socially), but also inwardly. We feel we must satisfy our own criteria for the well-lived life.
In light of the above, it is no wonder that we feel compelled to cling to and defend our egos. In trying to balance so many things at once, it can be extremely difficult to achieve a consistent sense of identity or success. So if and when we feel we finally we’ve landed on the right path, we are inclined to do all we can to preserve it, defending it with great vigilance, perhaps even desperation.
Ego defensiveness, then, is ultimately rooted in a sense of fear and fragility. Among other things, we are afraid of personal or social failure, loneliness, aimlessness, guilt, pain, and death. With so much to fear and so much that could feasibly go wrong, it is hard to fault people for vigilantly defending themselves. Life is no longer as simple as worrying about where our next meal will come from. Its complexity has grown exponentially, complicating our attempts to secure a consistent sense of identity and personal wholeness.
Despite the difficulty of successfully navigating the challenges of modern life, I do believe it is possible for us to progress toward wholeness. But in order to do so, we must find ways of loosening our attachments to and our need to defend our egos. Vigilantly clinging to and defending the ego is a primary source of pain and strife in the modern world. We must also find ways of releasing or diminishing the fears, anxieties, and pressures that buttress ego defensiveness. This will comprise our concern in upcoming posts.
